Carrie Underwood Shares Her Emotional Journey After Having 3 Miscarriages. Many Can Relate.

“I had always been afraid to be angry because we are so blessed.”

When it comes to celebrities, the "Average Joe" often assumes those in the limelight "have it all." Yet, while stars such as country singer Carrie Underwood know they're incredibly blessed, they're not immune to hardship and heartbreak. For Underwood, in particular, 2017 and early 2018 were especially difficult, as the singer suffered three consecutive miscarriages in less than two years.

"I'd kind of planned that 2017 was, you know, going to be the year that I work on new music, and I have a baby. We got pregnant early 2017, and didn't work out," the "Cry Pretty" singer told CBS Sunday Morning's Tracy Smith.

Underwood, 35, welcomed her first child, son Isaiah, with husband and retired NHL star Mike Fisher in 2015. While the couple accepted the first miscarriage as God's plan, Underwood revealed that she suffered two more miscarriages — one in the spring of 2017 and one earlier this year.

"It happens. And that was the thing, in the beginning it was like, 'Okay, God, we know this is, just wasn't Your timing. And that is all right. We will bounce back and figure our way through it.' And got pregnant again in the spring, and it didn't work out," she added, noting that "literally right after finding out that I would lose a baby, I'd have a writing session." 

From this pain, "Cry Pretty" was born.

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"I had always been afraid to be angry," Underwood explained. "Because we are so blessed. And my son, Isaiah, is the sweetest thing. And he's the best thing in the world. And I'm like, 'If we can never have any other kids, that's okay, because he's amazing.' And I have this amazing life. Like, really, what can I complain about? I can't. I have an incredible husband, incredible friends, an incredible job, an incredible kid. Can I be mad? No."

"And I got mad," she added.

However, upon fearing another miscarriage, Underwood tapped into her faith. 

"Mike was away just for the evening, and I texted him, and I was like, 'I don't really want to be alone, so I'm just gonna go snuggle with Isaiah.' And I don't know how I didn't wake him up, but I was just sobbing," the "Love Wins" singer explained. "And I was like, 'Why on Earth do I keep getting pregnant if I can't have a kid? Like, what is this? Shut the door. Like, do something. Either shut the door or let me have a kid.'"

Days later, Underwood learned she had nothing to worry about — this time, everything was fine. She ultimately credited her conversation with God for her "miraculous" second pregnancy, which she announced in August.

In many instances, women feel ashamed to reveal they've suffered a miscarriage, as such an event — albeit horrific — carries a negative stigma. As actor James Van Der Beek said in a recent Instagram post about his own family's experience with miscarriage, we need a new term because, "'Mis-carriage,' in an insidious way, suggests fault for the mother - as if she dropped something, or failed to 'carry.'  From what I've learned, in all but the most obvious, extreme cases, it has nothing to do with anything the mother did or didn't do. So let's wipe all blame off the table before we even start."

Dr. Jessica Zucker also launched the #IHadAMiscarriage campaign in 2014 to break the taboo associated with prenatal loss. As Dr. Zucker said, "Silence begets stigma which begets shame." But, by sharing the pain, as Underwood has, society can slowly learn to shower grieving mothers and their family with support, not shame.

Underwood's fans were quick to share their support for the Grammy winner and to emphasize that, no matter how perfect a person's life might seem on the surface — especially that of an admired celebrity — we mustn't judge or assume, for we have no idea what personal struggles and heartaches they're hiding behind their bright smile.

"This brought me to tears! Often times we don't understand what God is doing but we have to trust and know that in the end it's exactly what he wanted for our lives," @Jannelybean tweeted.

We wish Underwood and her new baby a happy, healthy pregnancy! We cannot wait to meet the newest addition to the family. Until then, enjoy Underwood's full CBS Sunday Morning segment below.

Cover image via Tinseltown / Shutterstock

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