13 Things You Wanted To Grow Up For Until You Actually Did


When you're a kid, life is so unfair. Parents and teachers make all the rules. No one listens to you. Sigh. 

So, you yearn to be a grown-up and make your own rules. You may not be able to buy your Dunkaroos and Fruit Roll-Ups today, but one day you'll be the one with the credit card. Until then, tantrum anyone?  

When you actually become an adult, though, you realize a lot of the things you dreamed about aren't what you expected. 


Here are some things you just couldn't wait to do as a grown-up:

1. Stay up late.

Ah, remember how bad you wanted to stay up past your bedtime, but no one would let you? Now, you wish everyone would worry about your sleep schedule. Less work, more sleep, please?! 

2. Be 18 or older so you could call and order things from TV.

Remember those commercials that touted toys at you, but reminded you that you're just a little shrimp with no power? "You must be 18 or older to call." Well, now we are, goddamnit. Too bad we still have no money and can now understand what "just four easy payments of $39.99" really means. 

3. Buy all the junk food you want.

Yes, those colorful boxes covered in characters were always calling your name. Maybe you threw a tantrum or two about them. Maybe your parents vowed to never take you to the grocery store again. Now, you're a real-a$$ adult with the ability to do all your own grocery shopping. 

The bad news is your metabolism just isn't what it once was. Oh, and you understand the health risks involved in eating your body weight in sugary snacks. Ignorance was bliss. 

4. Live away from your family.

Mom and dad drove you nuts, and you couldn't wait to get out of the house and make your own rules. 

Except when you finally do, you realize how much your parents did for you. Now, you have to do it all yourself. Paying bills, buying groceries and doing laundry all pretty much suck. But the worst is definitely when you're sick. No one can truly take care of you like your parents. 

5. Date.

TV shows and movies made it seem like having a boyfriend or girlfriend was all you needed in life. The second someone likes you back, you'll be in love forever. Yeah, no. Dating can actually totally suck and relationships are much more complicated than you could have ever imagined. Happily ever after doesn't happen after one magical night where you lost an uncomfortable shoe. 

6. Not be told what to do.

Yeah, sure, making your own decisions is super liberating, but sometimes it would be really, really great if someone else could just do it for you. Please? 

7. Wear makeup.

When you're little, makeup is this amazingly fun, grown-up thing to do. When you're an adult, it's a necessity in order to cover that zit before anyone sees you. Whenever someone sees you without it, they ask if you're tired or sick. 

8. Make your own money so you don't need to do chores to get it.

The value of money is a hard concept to grasp when you're just a kid. Now that you get it, you're working hard and long hours to make ends meet. You'd gladly make your bed over having to work overtime. 

9. Buy all the toys you want.

Too bad adult toys are things like laptops, smartphones and Vitamix blenders

10. Drive.

Driving always seemed so cool and bada$$. You could go wherever you want to! Except, once you actually have a license, you learn how much gas and insurance costs, how much traffic sucks and that the place you're going is work. 

11. Be as smart as as your parents.

When you're young, you think mom and dad know everything. When you grow up, you realize they can be just as clueless as you were. 

12. Go to bars.

Going out to your favorite bar with your crew is what great sitcoms are made of. Bars are where all the adult fun happens, right? Wrong again, little guy. Now that you're finally old enough to hang out in them, you just want people to find cheaper alternatives that don't leave you broke, hungover and ashamed. 

13. Have your own dog or cat.

Dogs may be man's best friend, but they're also a lot more work than you imagined as a kid. Having dogs means waking up earlier for walks, purchasing food, grooming and visits to the vet. When planning any kind of trip, you have to make sure you have someone to watch them or figure out the logistics of bring them with you. Both dogs and cats are a lot of responsibility, work and money. 

Adulthood isn't all bad, though.

Yeah, a lot of these things may not have turned out to be what you expected. Sometimes things like money, work and responsibility can bring you down. 

But then there's the moments where these things are exactly what you need. Like when you're up all night laughing so hard you cry with your best friend. Or when you meet the love of your life at a bar. Or that time you went to a diner and ordered a birthday sundae even though it's was three months away.

Being an adult means making your own choices and mistakes. You get to set your own goals and expectations. You can be as messy as you want, spend time with whoever you want when you want and no one will ever force you to sing songs you hate ever again. 

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