9-Year-Old Hilariously Nails 'The New Yorker's' Cartoon Caption Contest

She "has been quietly and masterfully slaying the @NewYorker’s caption contest and it’s pure delight."

Every week, The New Yorker shares a cartoon and asks readers to submit their best caption ideas. The caption contest is limited to people age 13 or older, but they may want to reconsider the age limit after seeing this 9-year-old's work. 

Yesterday, Bess Kalb, an Emmy-nominated writer for Jimmy Kimmel Live! and humor writer for The New Yorker, tweeted out a series of cartoons for which her cousin's daughter came up with captions. 


"Everything is terrible but my cousin's 9-year old daughter Alice has been quietly and masterfully slaying the @NewYorker's caption contest and it's pure delight," she wrote. "There are so many (she grabs every issue before her mom can get ahold of it) and every single one of them is perfect."

The hilarious young girl has even asked for a collection of every New Yorker cartoon with the real captions removed so she can come up with her own. Kalb added that in addition to being really clever, Alice is "also so kind and an awesome kid." Sounds like she has a pretty bright future ahead of her with those attributes. 

Fellow Twitter users were instantly enamored with Alice's hilarious and spot-on captions. Kalb's initial tweet about the cartoons has been shared more than 15,000 times and has amassed more than 64,000 likes. 

Alice's mom Kim Kassnove shared that her daughter is basking in her 15 minutes of fame. "She refuses to take off her sunglasses indoors, called me 'toots' and asked me to order her a tuna roll with quinoa for dinner," Kassnove wrote on Twitter. "We're in trouble." 

Kalb, on the other hand, used her little cousin's viral cartoon captions as an opportunity to remind others about the importance of encouraging creativity in girls. As a comedy writer herself, Kalb knows firsthand how few women are involved in comedy writing compared to men. 

"Alice is so lucky her amazing, hilarious mom @kimkassnove recognizes and celebrates her for trying (DILIGENTLY) to be funny. It's exhausting to beat this drum, but comedy writing is an overwhelmingly male-dominated enterprise. Look through Emmy nominees for talk and sketch shows," she tweeted. "Sometimes there are more Joshes and Daniels on shows than all women combined. This is a startlingly frequent and real thing. I've talked to a lot of other female late night and comedy TV writers and many of us never wrote or did comedy in school because that was for the dudes." 

Kalb encouraged people to give the funny girls in their lives the reassurance they need to continue to work on their comedy and not to believe the gross myth that "women aren't funny." 

"When a 9-year old girl is fucking funny, tell her. When she turns 15, remind her. Daniels and Joshes and Mikes and Joes and Peters (TRULY HIGH FREQUENCY COMEDY NAMES) are told that constantly. Boys get to use comedy to get through high school. Girls often have to hide it," she wrote. "Comedy needs validation. If you're lucky enough to have an Alice in your life, make sure she knows it."

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