5-Year-Old Writes His Own Obituary After Wondering Why Funerals Have To Be Sad

"'See ya later, suckas!' - The Great Garrett Underpants"

Though funerals are inherently somber events, that doesn't mean a bit of brevity can't be added to make sure people are still celebrating the life of the person who has passed, and get to share their happy memories. For one 5-year-old from Van Meter, Iowa, keeping his funeral happy was important. 

Garratt Matthias had stage 4 Alveolar Fusion Negative Rhabdomyosarcoma (ARMS), and battled the rare form of cancer for nine months before passing away on July 6. It impacted his inner ear, temporal bone, and cranial nerve before spreading to the rest of the body.

During his treatment, his parents Ryan and Emilie Matthias, met other families in similar situations and attended several funerals. According to the Des Moines Register, Garrett would ask his family where they were and wonder why funerals had to be sad. 

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"He would say, 'Why are funerals so sad? I'm going to have bouncy houses at mine," his mother told the publication.

She and her husband started writing down their young son's thoughts about death when the topic came up in conversation. In June 2018, they were told Garrett's cancer was terminal. The family was naturally heartbroken, but they knew when the time came, they weren't going to give their son a "regular" funeral. 

They were going to give Garrett the happy send-off he wanted. Their son even opted to write his own obituary, and it is filled with the joyful musings of a 5-year-old. 

In his obituary, which was published in the Des Moines Register on July 11, 2018, Garrett responded to a number of prompts, such as "The things I love the most are:", "My favorite people are:" He reveals his favorite superheroes as well as his nickname, "The Great Garrett Underpants."

The things he loved the most include, "Playing with my sister, my blue bunny, thrash metal, Legos, my daycare friends, Batman and when they put me to sleep before they access my port."

He also touched on some tougher topics, such as the things he hates. "[I hate] pants!, dirty stupid cancer, when they access my port, needles, and the monkey nose that smells like cherry farts … I do like the mint monkey nose like at Mayo Radiation and that one guy that helped me build Legos (Randy)."

When it came to his funeral arrangements, he said he'd prefer to be cremated. "I want to be burned (like when Thor's Mommy died)," he said. "And made into a tree so I can live in it when I'm a gorilla."

"I am going to be a gorilla and throw poo at Daddy!" he wrote. 

When asked if he'd like a big or small funeral, he responded, "Funerals are sad: I want 5 bouncy houses (because I'm 5), Batman, and snow cones." 

The obituary ends with "See ya later, suckas!" signed "The Great Garrett Underpants."

His parents will hold a Celebration of Life ceremony and will be trying to meet their son's wishes once they "figure out how the hell to get his ashes made into a tree and locate a nature preserve, so his tree resides in a protected area." In the obituary, the family also thanked all of the doctors and team members who assisted them during their son's treatment.

It's a happy, humorous obituary that captures the honest and pure thoughts of a young boy. It was also a fitting celebration of his life because Garrett's parents told KCCI8 that Garrett never lost his sense of humor. He would often tease hospital staff and would play pranks with whoopee cushions and by pinning unsuspecting people with clothespins. He was also fond of saying, "'See ya later alligator." 

(H/T: People)

Cover image via  Evgeny Atamanenko I Shutterstock

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