He sounds like he's going to die, he can't move off the couch and he needs constant nurturing and tending to. He has a man cold.
Even if you've never heard of the term, you've probably come across a man who's had it.
"Man cold" is a term for how some men react when they experience a simple cold. And it's pretty hilarious.
Nearly all men will die from man colds unless they are administered immediately with large amounts of mindless TV such as daytime TV, or childrens' cartoons. It is essential that they not move from bed or a comfy sofa to allow for rehabilitation, and must have tissues and man cold medicine (such as chocolate biscuits, McDonalds, or a nice cup of tea) brought to them constantly by a nearby female.
In this British parody from YouTube channel Atomic Wedgie, the afflicted male wants to drink Lem-Sip (a hot lemon drink for cold symptoms), watch the cartoon CBeebies, and call for professional medical help.
Hmm, sounds kind of familiar. We're pretty sure the man cold epidemic has spread to America too.
So are men's colds really worse than women's?
According to a study of about 1,700 people through England's University of Glasgow, men were more likely than women to overrate their common cold symptoms. Their cold symptoms weren't different, but the way they responded to them was.
With the pressure on men to always hold in their feelings and act tough, maybe it's not the worst thing that these man colds allow men the opportunity to express a different side. Just as long as they remember to give some nurturing back once they feel better.
If you recognize any of the symptoms in this video, it could be the dreaded man cold. You know what to do.
Help to spread the awareness.