Nick Offerman is best known for portraying the libertarian, steak-and-whiskey lovin' Ron Swanson in Parks and Recreation. In his latest role as "food expert" Daniel Frances, Offerman takes us on a tour of his Pizza Farm, where junk food grows on trees.
He first shows us the acres of pepperoni pizza "plants."
"What could be healthier than this?" Offerman asks, gesturing to the slices of pizza hanging on the plants. "Acres of pizza kissed by the sun, stretching as far as the eye can see."
Then he moves on to the taquito orchard, where the fried Mexican dish — you guessed it — grows on trees.
"We also have orchards of taquito trees," he says, "soaking up the minerals and vitamins from the sun before we pick 'em and deliver them straight to those school lunch trays."
Naturally, sloppy joes and soda were included.
"These fields produce hot, moist sloppy joes all year round," he says, digging one out from the dirt. "Thanks to the nutrients in the cola we use to water them."
As silly as the video might be, it's telling of the state of school lunches today. (I mean, when pizza can be considered a vegetable serving, you know something's up.) The video, co-sponsored by the American Heart Association, aims at encouraging the public to pressure lawmakers to renew strong nutrition standards for school lunches.
"Our children's health shouldn't be a laughing matter," the call to action read. "Tell lawmakers to help our kids get the healthy futures they deserve."
Watch the full video here: