Some actors only do comedies. Others like the thrill of starring in action movies. Academy Award-winner Matt Damon's favorite genre of movie, evidently, is "requiring exceedingly expensive rescue missions funded by the United States government." Hey, everybody needs a niche.
Quora user Kynan Eng crunched the numbers and found that when you add up all of the "Matt Damon, you get back here right now" moments in his movies, it adds up to a staggering $900 billion in rescue missions, adjusting for 2015 valuations of a dollar. While some of the figures could be pulled out of thin air (we don't actually know how much it would cost to build some of these various spaceships, for instance) it's a pretty fun look at things.
Here's how that total breaks down over the course of his incredible career (mild spoilers ahead):
Matt Damon's first rescue came in Courage Under Fire in 1996, with a helicopter rescue that cost a cool $300,000.
Just two years later in Saving Private Ryan, the search mission to find Damon's character amid the battles of World War II was a $100,000 venture, not to mention all of the death benefits paid out to the families of the soldiers lost along the way.
The spaceship required to unite humans drifting around the galaxy used in 2000's Titan A.E. was valued at $200 billion, and also marked the first of many space misadventures for Damon.
The private flight that brought Damon home from the Middle East in Syriana would have run about $50,000, which is the same amount that the U.S. Army would need to spend bringing him back from the Middle East — again — in Green Zone.
While we can't blame him for his actions, he caused about $100 million in damages to the spaceship and the cost of getting tracked down by security in Elysium.
Most recently, Damon returned to space when he starred in The Martian as astronaut Mark Watney, who gets left behind during a manned mission to Mars. NASA needed to spend $200 billion in overtime costs and materials to send help before he starved to death. In his defense, though, he was able to repair and repurpose the Pathfinder, so he earned a very tiny part of his keep back.
Of course, this figure doesn't even include how much money was wasted when Jason Bourne lost his memory, throwing away all of that good and expensive CIA assassin training and causing one heck of a manhunt.
Nearly a trillion dollars later, all we can say is that it was definitely worth it and we'd gladly spend another trillion to bring him safely back to us should he find himself in a pickle again.
For the good of taxpayers across the country, however, let's hope Damon's next movie involves him staying at home. He's great and all, but his passport definitely needs to be revoked.
Cover image via: Denis Makarenko / Shutterstock.com