J.J. Watt is a 6-foot-5, 289-pound defensive end who plays for the Houston Texans, which means you don't want to be his enemy under any circumstances. Not on a dance floor, not at a Zac Brown Band show, and definitely not on a football field. In case you ever cross paths with Watt, it's probably best to either back away quietly, or know how to engage him without unleashing the beast within.
With that in mind, it's a blessing that the football star recently provided the keys to his heart when it comes to friendship: breakfast. Yes, breakfast. Completely unprompted, Watt tweeted about the most important meal of the day yesterday:
In the next tweet, his feelings grew serious.
Breakfast is this man's religion.
Don't mess with him, even if you're incapable of digesting a breakfast.
So there you have it. If you've stepped on J.J. Watt's toes or cut him in line inadvertently, just offer to buy him a 12-egg omelette stuffed with bacon, pancakes, French toast, and waffles, among other things. Don't get cute, just focus on breakfast.
Cover image: Wikimedia