Anyone who's watched Jimmy Kimmel Live in the last 12 years has probably noticed Kimmel using the phrase "Apologies to Matt Damon, we ran out of time" at the end of an episode. It started as a joke, with Kimmel making it seem as if the Academy Award-winning actor was supposed to be a guest, but got bumped due to time constraints.
But things started to get real.
In 2008, Damon created a music video with Kimmel's then-girlfriend Sarah Silverman titled "I'm F—ing Matt Damon." The last line in the video apologizes to Kimmel, saying they're all out of time. Not to be outdone, Kimmel responded by making a video with Matt Damon's longtime friend and collaborator Ben Affleck. "I'm F—ing Ben Affleck" took the feud to fantastic new heights.
In 2013, Damon took over hosting for an episode of the show, which he renamed to Jimmy Kimmel Sucks!
Matt Damon has appeared on Kimmel's recurring segment Mean Tweets, but it appears that, "Too bad they don't give Oscars for blowing ass, because Matt Damon would win every year. Go buy another zoo and live in it, Bourne I-d—khead. #NODISRESPECTTOBENAFFLECK" did not come from an anonymous source.
Things recently came to a head when Damon was determined to be on Kimmel's show to promote his new movie, The Martian. Hellbent not to get bumped, Damon had to become a master of disguise and sneak onto the stage in place of Kimmel's intended guest, Dr. Phil.
Going beyond sporting Dr. Phil's trademark bald head and mustache, Damon also recited folksy analogies the psychologist might say: "A squirrel in a top hat is like a donkey in a dress. You can take it to the prom, but if you try to make it wear lipstick, you're gonna get kicked."
After a bit of discussion, Damon dropped the charade and said that he thought he was supposed to be on the show tonight. The source of the confusion dropped a bomb on everyone: the two had discussed it in couples therapy.
In the presence of a psychologist, the two opened up about the feud, explaining their hurt feelings.
There were some barbs thrown, particularly when Kimmel was asked, "What do you think it feels like to be him everyday?" as he sits and waits, hoping not to be bumped from the show.
"I'd imagine it would suck to be him," Kimmel responded. "First of all, look at him. You know, I mean, he's trying to be a movie star. [...] Look at his face and his body. That's not a movie star face and it's not a movie star body."
There were some tender moments, too. When Damon was asked to say something nice about Kimmel, he said, "To be fair, I like his show. I wouldn't have waited for 12 years to get on it if I didn't like it."
Check out the soul-searching journey in its entirety here:
[All images via: Jimmy Kimmel Live]