How To Fall In Love With Someone: A Beginner's Guide

Above all else, you must learn to love yourself first.

Disney princesses and romantic comedies make love look simple. Yet, if you talk to anyone who's ever been in an actual relationship, they'll tell you that there's no foolproof guide on how to fall in love. While it's easy to fall in love, it's being in love that poses the real challenge.

Falling in love isn't all too difficult, at least on the surface. It's easy to lust after someone from afar, to dream about who they are and what they're like before you truly get to know them. But, once your mutual attraction leads to an actual date, you have to learn how to fall in love again, as your fantasies rarely align with reality. You must allow your potential partner to show their true colors so you can honestly determine your innermost feelings, not just those brought on by physical chemistry.

So, how do you go about falling in love with someone for keeps?

Clarisse Meyer / Unsplash
Clarisse Meyer / Unsplash

SPOILER ALERT! There's no tried-and-true approach to falling in love. Basically, you just need to let it happen. Thus, you must get out of your own way and allow yourself to be open to love

To do so, you must first learn how to fall in love with yourself. You're no good for anyone else if you're no good to yourself. But, if you love yourself, it radiates outward, ultimately attracting those who could potentially become your life partner.

William Stitt / Unsplash
William Stitt / Unsplash

Once you find someone who fills you with the sort of joy that comes along with a new relationship, you must do everything you can to determine whether this budding romance has the capacity to stand the test of time once the "honeymoon" phase fades

Do they make you laugh? Are there any glaring issues you need to address up front? Do they share your morals and values? 

There are countless questions you need to ask yourself before you can confidently declare your love for this person. Of course, you also have to acknowledge you will never find anyone who meets every single one of your criteria. You need to accept their flaws and, if you still want to be with them in spite of every quirk, that's how you'll know they've won your heart for good.

Christiana Rivers / Unsplash
Christiana Rivers / Unsplash

Once you recognize how deep your feelings flow, you must take this newfound love to the next level by telling your partner you love them. While there's no perfect time to say "I love you," you should never hesitate. Love doesn't come around every day, so you must grab on and refuse to let go. After all, everything worth having's worth fighting for in this life.

Unfortunately, falling in love doesn't guarantee that the relationship will last forever. Many couples fall out of love naturally, while life circumstances force others to part. Regardless of the potential for heartbreak, however, you must not refrain from sharing your feelings with the one you love, for you must appreciate every moment you have together.

There's no clear path to love, let alone forever love. Instead, you must pave the road as you go. Advice can act as guideposts on your journey, but only your partner can hold your hand as you proceed. But that's what's great about love — no matter how far you two walk, at least you walk together.

Cover image via Pablo Heimplatz / Unsplash

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