Many people dream of the day when they'll find "the one" to build a future with. Nobody intends to have a failed relationship. Most people just kinda wing it and hope for the best.
Is there anything that can really prepare us and give a fighting chance at a successful long-term relationship? You betcha.
Here are six things:
We need to realize from day one, that we'll never find Mr. or Mrs. Perfect. Why? Because as humans, we're all flawed. We just have to decide if our partners' particular flaws are the kind we can live with and accept.
We're all complicated individuals. A partner can't read our minds or relive our past experiences, so they can't sympathize with all of our feelings. They might "get" us to a certain extent, but nobody is capable of understanding us completely.
Okay, so, crazy may not be the best word, but everyone has their quirks and issues. When in a new relationship, many of us hide parts of our personality deemed undesirable, but eventually... it all comes out.
As long the relationship is healthy and not abusive, forgive yourself and each other for being a bit messed up sometimes. Oh, and apologize... then apologize again.
When someone says they "want to find love," they often mean they "want to be loved."
As children, it's pretty much all about us and our needs. As adults, instead of trying to re-create the love from our parents, we need to realize it's a two-way street. Mature love isn't just about our own needs, it's reciprocal. It's about being loved, but it's also about loving.
It's not all rainbows and unicorns. Understand that when we take on a partner, it's a "partner-ship." We'll have the day-to-day activities and chores to contend with, so don't expect every moment to be glamorous. (But there will be some unicorns, we promise.)
"But if you love me, you wouldn't be trying to change me." Um, nope. Scratch that from your go-to argument lines.
Accept that we don't know everything and that we'll continue to learn and grow throughout the entire relationship. Sometimes our partner will be the teacher and we'll be the pupil and sometimes it'll be the other way around.
"If you loved me, you'd try to change me." That's better.
We tend to romanticize relationships.
But being more realistic...
...will give us a better shot at a successful one.
Check out the video below to get a better understanding of these 6 vital points.
Share with your friends who are in relationships (or the friends you want to be).